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| it's just not the same |
| 11.03.03 (9:53 am) [edit] |
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i tried to work with you, but it's just not working out. i'm sorry. i'm going back to what i'm familiar with.
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| randomness |
| 11.02.03 (9:40 pm) [edit] |
so much has happened in the past couple days. for one thing, i have a boyfriend now. wow, it feels like my first time all over again. it's been a long year & a half as a single. i couldn't have made a better choice than miguel.
culturefest was awesome. oyfa rocked it. we are no longer virgins. good job everyone! :D
he came back. i still remember that promise. but it's like what my boyfriend said: "There are opportunities, but it's not like I want them anymore."
everytime i get drunk, i end up kissing a girl. :oops: what the hell is wrong with me?!
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| retraction |
| 10.27.03 (8:48 am) [edit] |
I'm such a big baby when I'm feeling like crap. My last entry was retarded. Anyway, I'm feeling a little better now. God bless the makers of Dayquil. :)
So I spent my first weekend at UVA in sooooo long. Can you believe I haven't stayed a weekend here in a month?! Cuhrayzee! It was full of cfest practicing, mahogany, partying it up, devirginizations of the pita pit & a UVA football game, poker, guesstures, "djack" & kings, surprises from boobscrotchettes, good times with the other first years, car jammin', and sweet moments spent with him. All in all, my weekend was great!
I wish I could've gone to VCU, though, to see my girls. It's all good because they're coming here, right?! The "Happy/Slutty Drunks" need to reunite! And what's this I hear about some of the ex-Bunch coming up for c-fest & the OYFA party? Holler! I think a reunion is coming up!
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| whine, whine, whine! |
| 10.26.03 (6:40 pm) [edit] |
I absolutely [b]hate[/b] being sick. :cry:
Friendships are beginning to fade. Or maybe it's just me. Oh, Lord. My "best friend syndrome" is beginning to kick in again. I was praying it wouldn't.
Is it all a front? I'm so lost with this person. One minute it's hot & the next minute it's cold. What the heck is going on? Cuz I sure don't know.
I didn't get any work done this weekend. I'm so behind in everything. What happened to my plan to stop doing everything half-assed?
I seriously want a single next year b/c it's moments like this when I just want to stay in my room & cry in peace and quiet. I need my space. I'm too selfish to have a roommate.
Once again, I absolutely [b]hate[/b] being sick. :cry:
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| trivial |
| 10.23.03 (11:12 am) [edit] |
I need to stop eating so much. Someone's packing on a couple pounds. haha
Anyway, I'm finally getting my shit straight & I'm focusing on school. Yay! I'm so proud of myself. Hopefully I keep this up.
But, yeah, I told myself over & over again, "Don't give up," but it looks like I'm going to this time. Sometimes you just have to, ya know? Why dwell in the past when there's so much more out there for you? :wink:
Check out my "snapshots." It's updated!
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| ventilation system |
| 10.20.03 (11:06 pm) [edit] |
I feel like such a freaking retard. :x College is definitely kicking my ass. Getting close to a 4.0 at SHS was easy for me. Getting close to a 3.0 at UVA is out of reach for me.
For those of you going to college next year, be prepared to get bad grades. Yeah, you think you're the shit in high school? Just wait until you get into college. All I do is read, read, read, write, write, write, study, study, study. Blah. I'm so mad at myself right now.
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| broken streak |
| 10.20.03 (12:38 am) [edit] |
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I've never been on an actual date before until tonight. Isn't that crazy? I've had so many boyfriends/semi-boyfriend s & not one ever took me out on a date. It was basically chillen at my house or his house or grabbing a bite to eat at a fast food joint. Nothing big. So...thanks Miguel for making my first date special! :D
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| unexpected |
| 10.18.03 (8:05 am) [edit] |
This weekend was planned months ago. I and most of the Salem recent alumni & their moms were coming home for homecoming. Too bad as soon as I got home I received bad news. :( What's up with my family & car accidents? I just don't get it. As always, God was and still is on our side. Thank [b]you[/b].
Last night was the first time I ever told my cousin I loved him. He usually tells me he does, but I never said it back b/c I felt weird even though he is basically my brother. And for those of you who know me well, you know how I'm big on "I love you's" with my immediate family. I don't know, I shouldn't have let something happen first before I started saying it. [i]Let the ones you love know you love them before it's too late.[/i] Yeah, it's like that.
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| traffic |
| 10.16.03 (11:01 am) [edit] |
Don't you hate it when you're trying to go to sleep, but all you do is stare at the ceiling & think about things? I lay there and I think about random things such as [i]What do I have to do tomorrow?, What is the weather going to be like?, How should I start my paper?, Why am I still stuck?, Why do I even care?[/i] I barely have time during the day to think about these things, so I punish myself at night.
Anyway, I'm going home again this weekend. Surprise, surprise. lol! After this weekend, I won't be home until Thanksgiving break, so I should live up the good times with my family & friends. :D
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| "...if they don't win it's a shame..." |
| 10.15.03 (9:05 pm) [edit] |
[b]The Cubs lost.[/b] :cry: *sigh* I'm still proud they made it that far, though. There's always next year, right?
I hope the Red Sox kill the Yankees. And if the Red Sox go to the World Series, I hope they crush the Marlins. Darn you Cabrera, Beckett, & Pudge!
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| first times |
| 10.13.03 (10:21 pm) [edit] |
I was devirginized today. Yeah, by seven people. It was so good. That white stuff sure hits the spot. By the way, I'm talking about this restaurant called El Rodeo. Now I know what all the hype is about when it comes to their special "white sauce." Janks is so good!
[image]Charrrleney_158009 722.jpg[/image]
So I received my first balloon creations today. Andrew's little brother created a sword, dog, and hat for me. I always wanted to get those things when I was little, but all the other kids would get to the clown/entertainer before me. Oh, and too bad the freaking hat popped on my head. I still can't hear out of my left ear & that was 5 hrs. ago! :(
Oh, and someone's going back to C-ville tomorrow! Yay! lol
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| matters of the heart |
| 10.12.03 (11:46 pm) [edit] |
You know what's beautiful? When you see an elderly couple walking down the street & holding hands. I don't know about you, but it brings a smile to my face. They are living proof that real love survives in a world full of temptations.
I look at my friends who are madly in love with each other and I wish I had what they have. I want to fall in love & know what it's like. I've said [i]"I love you"[/i] to past boyfriends, but I realized later that it was empty. The next time I say it, I want it to be for sure. Look what watching sappy movies does to a person. lol :lol:
By the way, I hate looking back on the past & getting sad about how things [b]would've, could've, and should've been[/b]. It sucks knowing that you can't be with the person who you ideally want to be with, but you just have to accept it and move on. You can either dwell on the past or live in the present. One thing's for sure, though: you can't help how your heart feels for someone. It just happens. :roll:
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| switcheroo |
| 10.10.03 (11:39 pm) [edit] |
Is change really a good thing? Well, we'll see. I left [b]Xanga[/b] a couple of days ago. I've moved on to greener pastures & I've landed here. Let's see how I'll deal.
Well, I'm back in [b]VA Beach [/b]right now. I miss [b]Charlottesville[/b] already. I never thought I would say that, but never say 'never' right? Four days in a polluted atmosphere. lol That's the life of a VA Beezy kid!
Midterms are just about over for me. I really need to stop doing things half-assed schoolwise. I need to start studying more & taking schoolwork more seriously. Gotta make them parents proud, ya know? [b]Miguel[/b] calls my bluff on this one, but I'm going to try my hardest to do better. There are just [b]too many distractions[/b] in college.
Anyway, that's all for now. My ass needs to catch up with my long lost friend: sleep. :wink:
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